Life Goal: Getting my shit together.

I’m increasingly impressed with my ability to think that I’m a complete fuck up and later find out I’m only 90% fuck up.

In hopes of getting the most out of that 10% of success in life I’ve decided to make a list of life goals.

advice

They are these:

Get a second beagle puppy.

beagles12

Get a third (and possibly fourth) beagle puppy.

beagles

Find a house in Chicago that is conducive to multiple beagles.

laughing

Find a permanent job/never be a “trainee” again.

giveittome

Find a job that pays enough to maintain my lifestyle of Netflix, good bourbon, and beagles.

swordandthestone

Not have anxious, insecurity freakouts on boyfriend (more realistic goal: decrease number of anxious, insecurity freakouts on boyfriend)

daisy

Be amazing like David Bowie.

bowieclass

Resist urge to read comment sections in the news.

iq

Be able to talk to people at social gatherings (more realistic goal: decrease number of bourbons it takes to talk to people at social gatherings)

hell

Realize that “full time” means 40 hours, not 65, 70, or 80.  Also decrease caffeine intake.

tired

Convince self that socializing isn’t death

company

Figure out why Ben and Jerry’s says there are 4 servings in a pint (it’s clearly 2 at best)

icecream

Ok.  Plan to get life on Track: Go!