Job (or Postdoc) Searches as explained by Bowie

(Because this is all there is in my head.)

obliette
First comes the sudden realization that you are graduating at some point.  That the graduate school bubble of security will end.  Oh, and also, you have to pay back all those loans.

panic

But it’s okay, right?  Because through all of that schooling and training you gained awesome experience.  You know what you want and you can do it!  Who would pass up someone like you?  This is completely delusional, you just don’t know it yet.  So you start confidently sending out application after application.

bowiethenextday

But after one or two or three dozen and no responses…

ponderingbowie

And then you start to think there may just be something wrong with you.  Because seriously, WTF?  Are you not even worth a rejection letter?

waiting

And you think maybe that professor that openly hated you, that you had constant mental warfare with, might have been right.  And maybe you should have taken the hints and reconsidered this a long time ago.

But then, just when you’ve finished that 5th pint of Americone Dream (because it’s inspirational ice cream), you get an interview!  And after one second of celebration, you suddenly realize that means you have to be impressive in person.  That’s really hard and sucky.

almost

But you try to pretend like you’re capable or something like that.  So you get all dressed up and put on your game face.

dressing

bowiegameface

And when you get there, you try to be all confident and shit.

bowieclass

But halfway through the interview, you realize you haven’t breathed in like 10 minutes and you’re running out of ways to say “Please dear god hire me.  I will do anything.”

breathing

So that was a bust.

bowie done

(Or, I don’t know.  Some people have that confidence thing and walk out of interviews all like this:)

bowieyay!

I don’t know. I don’t get it. Is this real? Do people ever actually feel like this after interviews?

Then people want to ask you how it went.  No matter how much you try to hide from people.  Your friends and family are always going to ask how things are going.  If you’re excited for graduation.  What your plans are.  And you have no answers.  Like, at all.

questionquestion2

And then your friends and loved ones will try to distract you.

distraction

Or sympathize.

notalone

And you’re just all like:

keepyourmouthshut

Because:

getting older

bowietears

 

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